A few weeks ago I set out to restart my blog. After almost 3 years since my last submission I figured its probably time to just buckle down and put pen to paper, err finger to keyboard.
Do you ever just sit in bed at night when you are supposed to be catching some zzz's and all of a sudden your mind is racing and the words that you've been wanting to write down are finally just flowing out? Well that has been me these last few months, but the fella wakes up at 4am to go to work the next town over and I'd feel awful if I woke him up with the clickity clack of my computer in the next room over. So here I sit writing to you what I finally mustered up to write while sitting on the couch watching Beast Master with my boys. Not quite as eloquent as it was in my dreams but it's something, sooo here it goes.
To be honest, I have really been struggling with sharing my thoughts and ideas with the world. It's that little voice that I have been trying so hard to understand lately that likes to say things like "Nobody wants to hear that" or "How is this going to help anyone?, "What makes you think you know more than the next person?", "Who are you to teach people?" And so the struggle continues. Why is it that we often say these things to ourselves, gosh knows I would never say it to a friend of mine. But we insist that we are not good enough or not worthy of sharing the knowledge we certainly have learned along the road.
I think most of my fear comes from not wanting to be rejected or feeling like I am the only one feeling these feelings ( or not feeling feelings) that I just immediately talk my self out of writing. I know that logically sharing certain things will surely not cause me harm but my heart literally races sometimes when I think about putting words out there for everyone to see. Why is that? Why does fitting in have to be so important for our silly little human hearts?
My goal here is to be real with you and talk about the stuff that makes me a little uncomfortable. So please bear with me if I come off as a bit of a goofball while I venture into this terrifying world of talking about the things that mean the most to me and fire me up.
So here's to the start of something wild! Are you ready to join me?!